Changes

So much has changed since my last update. I quit working with the trainer I had hired, took a month off weight training and cut down my meals from six a day to three larger ones.

In the first week of April I decided what I was doing wasn’t working for me. I wasn’t dieting for a show, so why was I being so strict about measuring/weighing every single piece of food I was eating. It was driving me crazy. From my perspective I think I should be able to eat all the vegetables I want in a day without measuring them. Like come on. I doubt I’ll gain weight if I eat unlimited lettuce, spinach, green beans, cucumbers, peppers and sugar snap peas. And second there are only so many vegetables I can eat in a day without feeling gross.

 Same thing with fruit. If I’m out at an event and eat a couple of pieces of fruit and some veggies I shouldn’t feel like oh I messed up my diet, so now I better eat a whole bunch of junk because I messed it up anyways so I might as well eat some of the other foods I’m not allowed to have and then overeat and tell myself as of tomorrow I’ll be back to following my diet perfectly and getting in all my workouts. That’s no way to live.

After doing a lot of soul searching, I decided that was it. No more stressing out about food. As long as I eat the healthy nutritious foods my body needs, I’ll be fine. I know enough about nutrition and how my body reacts to things that I’m fully of capable of doing my own thing. I don’t need someone else to tell me what to eat. 

As part of my process I wanted to get over wanting the “forbidden” foods that had seemed so tempting while strictly following a plan. So for the first week of April I decided I would have a treat every single day that week. These included frozen yogurt, cupcakes, cosmic cookies from Planet Organic and Booster Juice smoothies. With having a treat every day I didn’t feel the need to overdo it. I had my treat and that was it. By the end of the week I was over it. Sugary foods aren’t that amazing and I truly do feel better when I eat healthy.

After my week of treats the next phase was to eliminate weight training for a month and do three to four yoga classes a week. I went to a local yoga studio and bought a month unlimited pass so I was obligated to go. For the rest of the month I did my yoga classes and two spin classes a week. Spin is an hour long, but I only wanted to do 30 minutes so I would leave each class halfway through. I kind of felt like a jerk, but I just didn’t want to do that much cardio. For the month of April I also didn’t weigh/measure my food for the most part. The only thing I measured was oats and peanut butter because those are easy to overdo.

Low and behold at the end of the month I hadn’t gained any weight and was at the same place body wise I was at the start. Go figure. And my body felt the best it has in a couple years from all the yoga classes. And the biggest thing of all was I was way happier. By having three bigger meals I actually felt satisfied after eating. That was the biggest problem for me with six, I always felt kind of hungry and never satisfied, which would lead to me pigging out on junk. By changing things up I no longer felt like this.

I’m Back

I’m back and it’s time for me to start blogging on a regular basis once again. This year will be a little different then the past two since I’m not dieting down for any shows this year because I really want to focus on some other areas in my life. Even though I’m not dieting for a show, I’m still following a nutrition and workout plan. I started following my new plan on January 3 and have been really happy with how well my body has been responding so far, which has been really exciting because the plan is really different than any of the others I followed in the past. The biggest change with this plan is I’m eating a lot more carbs, and I’m doing a lot less cardio.

It is a little different being really strict about following a plan when I’m not dieting for a show. When I’m getting ready for a show the end goal is always top of mind, but now I don’t have that, which makes it a little easier to play the mind games with myself, where some days I question why I’m so strict, and rigid with my eating and training. The bottom line is I feel better when I eat clean and train hard. The hardest part for me are the days where I feel hungry all day long and just want to eat enough to feel full, but feeling hungry sometimes is something that comes along with getting leaner. My body is in a deficit and doesn’t like being there, so it wants me to eat more. Simple as that. But if I want to reach the leaness I want, I need to find a way to deal with that in a positive manner.

I chose to pursue a goal that is a little harder to achieve and to reach, which means I have to make some sacrifices along the way and work a little harder.

Much too long

Wow, it’s been way too long since I’ve posted in here. I was
really busy over the past couple months and put writing to the side, but now
that everything has been getting back under control it’s time to start writing
again.

Training front

I was doing great with training until September, then I hit
a rut where I didn’t feel like going to the gym (strange, I know) so I spent a
month slacking off and going maybe two to three times a week. I think that rut
was due to some stuff I had going on in my life that completely drained me
emotionally and mentally and that led to me slacking off.  Thankfully that’s all dealt with now and is a
thing of the past.  I finally started
getting back into the groove a couple weeks ago and I feel 100 times better.

I’m also hiring a new trainer to do my diet and workout
program and can’t wait to get started. I thought I was going to have to wait
until mid-January, but I completely lucked out and get to start this month and
I can’t wait.  I’ll have a good five to
six weeks before Christmas to bust my butt and I can’t wait to see how my body
changes with my new program. It will be different then the programs I have
followed before. I was looking for something more sustainable than what I was
doing in the past and that’s why I chose the trainer I did. The previous
trainer had me eating a total of a ¼ cup of starchy carbs a day for at least
four weeks while doing six hours of cardio a week, in addition to five weight
training sessions a week. Now that I’ve taken a step back I realize that’s just
stupidity. Yes, I have to eat clean to lose weight, and yes, I have to be
consistent and disciplined with my training to get ready for a show, but I
think there’s a point where going to that extreme is going to hurt my body in the
end. Don’t get me wrong, I know dieting down for a competition is “extreme”,
but I want to do it in the healthiest way possible.

I also want to work with a trainer who is going to be
straight up with me. I did everything my last trainer said to do as I was
dieting down and I wasn’t nearly lean enough. I would rather have a trainer who
says you’re not ready vs. one who says I look great the whole time, when in
reality I’m not at the point I should be.  I can’t wait to start this new journey. My
game plan is to spend the next six to 12 months in off-season mode and once I
hit that point in time I may (will most likely) consider
competing again.

Decision Made

Well, it took a lot of thought, and my final conclusion was that it is time for me to take a break away from competing and focus on other aspects in my life. At this time I don’t know how long my break will be, but I do know that I will continue to train hard and make healthy choices when it comes to eating.

Other life changes

In the past month I started a new daytime job, which is a lot more challenging than my previous job, but I’m really happy with it as I like to be continually challenged. I’m working on some huge projects and it’s going to be a great learning experience for me and I’m really excited about the level of the projects I’m working on.

I also picked up a few more personal training clients and I find working with them so rewarding. I love seeing the process they go through as they start to make healthier choices when it comes to food and start sticking with a consistent workout program. I feel so lucky to have the opportunity to help each of them and I love every second of it.

The last thing I’ve started doing is dedicating my free time to personal development. Instead of watching tv in my spare time I’m dedicating that time to learning. I’ve been reading a lot and it’s really changed how I think about the world and the opportunities that exist in it. I truly believe that I have the ability to shape my life and control where I end up five, 10 and 20 years down the road. I know what I want to accomplish and what’s important to me.

 

What to do next…

What should I do next? Well, that’s been what I have been trying to figure out for the past few weeks. There’s a couple of different things that I have been contemplating, but not sure which is the best option. So in the mean time I’m changing it up and seeing what happens.

On August 1 I’m starting a new training program which I’ll follow exactly and then I’ll assess my progress at the end of August and  decide then what’s next for me competition wise.

The possibilities are:

• Compete in Edmonton on October 29
• Wait till next spring to compete again

I know what I need to work on physique wise and I’m not sure I’ll be able to accomplish everything I want to before October. This is where taking a nice long off-season would be very benefical. But on the other hand competing is fun, I already have my pro tan (the stuff that didn’t make it in time before my last show due to the Canada Post strike), my memberships for the year are paid, so I only have to pay the show entry fee. Another bonus is that the show is in Edmonton so I don’t have to travel. There’s a lot of pros, but I also need to focus on some other stuff right now.

I’m a communications professional by day so I would like to work on growing my career a bit, I also personal train people on the side (I attained my certification last year) and would like to work with a few more clients.  Taking time away from the stage would allow me to focus a little more on these aspects of my life and would allow me to save a bit of cash instead of spending a bunch on doing a show.

In the meantime though I’ve been having a really good summer and enjoying life. I’m still happy with where my body is at a month post-show. I’ve never done this well before. Some of my fun activities have included taking a road trip to BC to spend some time out at the Shuswap, going GoKarting, attending family events and just really enjoying each and every day.

Post-show thoughts

This competition season was personally rewarding for me even though I didn’t win and don’t have any trophies to show for all my efforts. It’s all about the journey and process for me. I love the journey because I get to see how far I can push myself and what I fully capable of achieving. I find it rewarding because I know if I put the effort in and trust the process I’ll see the results I want.

As for the show weekend I have a few mixed feelings about that. The show was out of town and I was leaving for holidays directly from the city the show was in, so I had to pack all my show stuff plus everything I needed for a week out of town. I got home from work at 5:30 p.m. on Thursday and was running around doing stuff until 11 p.m. Friday morning I was up at 7 a.m. and getting stuff ready until I had to leave to get my spray tan done at 9:45 a.m.

I was a little bit worried about getting spray tan because I usually use pro tan and had heard a couple of horror stories about the place I was getting it done at the day prior to my appointment, at which point it was too late for any other options. The worst part was I ordered pro tan, but it got lost in transit due to the Canada Post strike. I went to the spray tan place and everything turned out ok except for my right bicep. For some reason there were four big streaks where the tanner wouldn’t stick. That totally stressed me out as I had put in so much work and my tanner wasn’t looking like it should. Somehow in the end the tanner finally rubbed in and looked even, but I was not happy at the time.

The other thing that stressed me out a bit was I wanted to leave at 11:30 a.m. once my tan was done drying, but I had to pick up my boyfriend and sister who were both running behind with their packing. It was 2:30 or 3 by the time we left the city, which added to my stress levels a bit. I just wanted to be in the car on the road so I could finally chill, but it was taking forever to get there.

The show itself went well. I was really happy with how l looked when I woke up in the morning and couldn’t wait till show time. I’m use to waking up at 5:30 a.m. so I was up by 6:30 a.m. and ready to go well before I had to be.  I got to the venue and figure was the first category in the show, which was nice. I’m happy I showed up at the venue ready to go as I didn’t have much time between when I arrived and when they took us backstage. I went on stage and did my thing. Here is a video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWiBBpzMtOA of my callout.

I felt good onstage and had fun with it. I worked hard to get there so I was going to enjoy my time up there even though I was in the second callout. I was out of the venue by 11:30 a.m. and didn’t need to be back until just after 5 p.m.

It was a beautiful day so I spent some time outside and enjoyed it and followed it up with a much-needed afternoon nap. During my time outside I managed to have a homeless man make fun of me. As we walked by he commented to his buddies on how I managed to get an awful burn in the tanning bed (I know show tan isn’t pretty, but seriously!!).

When it was time we headed back to the venue and I did my thing once more. I had fun on stage and can’t wait to see some of my stage pictures. After the show we went out for some food. My sister competed as well so she came with us. After that it was time for bed as we were getting up early the next morning to go for breakfast then we were off for a road trip to BC.

At the end of the day I’m happy I did both shows and went through the dieting process again. I hit a new personal best this year and I’m happy with that. It was amazing watching my body change and seeing all the changes. As for what’s next stay tuned…

Two days! Two days! Two days!

I really can’t wait for Saturday for a few different reasons. The first is this is the best I’ve ever looked prior to a show and I can’t wait to see what I look like all done up in my show suit. I gave this prep my all and I’m going out there on Saturday and doing my thing. I’m going to just enjoy the day and the final product of all my hard work.

The other reason has to do with the following. I wrote this on the weekend, but didn’t have the chance to post it. I would be lying if I said that this past week has been all good and that everything was going great. The honest truth is this past week has been a bit of a struggle. I’ve been feeling tired, run down and hungry and it’s the feeling tired that gets to me the most. I like feeling full of energy and don’t like feeling like I’m dragging during the day. The other struggle has been is that usually I’m a fairly patient person, but my patience has been growing short and I’ve been biting my tongue from snapping at others, especially the super perky morning receptionist at the gym.

The thing with me is I don’t like talking early in the morning. I’m in my own little world and focusing on what needs to get done. So I go to the gym at 6:30 a.m. still half asleep and I’m greeted by HI, HOW ARE YOU TODAY? And it takes all my energy at that time to muster up a cordial “Good.” I don’t need to be the bitchy lady who comes in and snaps, “It’s 6:30 in the morning, I’m tired and wish I was sleeping. Please stop with the rhetorical questions every morning because you really don’t want to hear how I’m really feeling right now.”

It comes down to that anything worth doing isn’t always easy and it’s the struggle that makes it worthwhile in the end. I thought about dropping out of the show because it would save me a good chunk of money and I could ease into my off-season and feel better, but my sister is competing at the show so I’m committed to going anyways and second if I quit now I would kick myself later. I have a hard time being a spectator when I have the choice to be a participant and sitting it the audience all day would be even harder on me than this last portion of prep. I also want to see what I’m capable of achieving.

It also helps that I have a great support network. My sister is getting ready for the same show, so she is dealing with the same stuff as me, so that helps to have someone to vent with who gets it. My boyfriend is also great. He cheers me up when I get down and continually tells me that I keep looking better on the days where I don’t see it. Same with my parents each time they see me they tell me that cant’ believe the changes.

End of post

So, now that I’m at the point where I’m two days out I’m glad I preserved. In life there are times that are harder than others and the reality is you can’t just quit when things get tough. It’s how you deal with those times that show what you’re really made of.

Now all I have left to do is clean my condo and pack for the weekend and it’s off to Calgary I go!

Two weeks

Two weeks

 In less than two weeks I’ll be on stage for my second figure competition of the season. Things have been going well and I like what I see in my progress pictures and in the mirror when I’m working out. This year I’ve taken my body to a point it’s never been at before and it’s really cool to see the daily changes.

 The only downside is that I’m getting a little tired and my body is starting to feel a little run down, but I keep telling myself I don’t have that much longer to go. During each workout I keep telling myself to push hard and make it count. I want to be the best I can possibly be and that requires giving it all I got for the next 10 days.

 I know the parts of me that still need work and can see where I still need to lose fat from, but I’m not stressing out over it. My mindset is I’ll do the work I need to in the gym and adhere to my diet 100 per cent and it will come. I’m also making a point of appreciating where I’m at right now. Sure I still have a ways to go, but I look good right now. I’ve put it a lot of hard work and it shows and I should appreciate it. I’m not falling into the rut of cutting myself down because I’m still not at my ultimate end goal. That takes time to reach, but I’m taking all the steps I need to, to get there. Right now I’m just being patient and enjoying each day and look forward to seeing the end result on July 2.

 

Show one

Well, show number one has already come and gone. The week leading up the show was a little insane, to say the least. I had to schedule in getting my hair and nails done, in addition to completing my training and prepping all my food for the week. I also went to the U2 concert three days before my show. I was a little stressed out about going to the concert because I had so much to do, but once I got there I decided I was living in the moment and enjoying it and I would worry about everything else later. The concert was great and I really enjoyed it. The only downside was that I had a bit of a meltdown on the way home because it was midnight by the time we got in my car and I still had a half hour drive home and had to prep my food for the next morning and be up at 5:30 to go get an hour of cardio done before work and I was only going to get three hours of sleep, which wasn’t nearly enough. Somehow I made it through the rest of the week and managed to complete all the tasks on my to do list.

Going into the show I knew I gave this prep my all and I was completely happy with how I looked and I didn’t care how I placed. For me it was all about getting there and reaching my goal. The day of the show was a lot of fun. My sister competed in fitness short and completely rocked her routine and won the fitness short category and won the award for the best fitness routine. It was her first show ever and she did a great job. It was an amazing experience to be able to compete at home for once. I was able to get ready at home and had a ton of people I know come out and watch me and cheer me on. It’s an amazing feeling hearing a bunch of people yelling your name when you’re on stage.

I owe a super big shout out to my boyfriend for how amazing he was during this prep. When I had my meltdown, he just sat there and told me calmly that I was slightly scary at that moment and he just wanted his girlfriend back. Some of the things he did for me include the following. When he was at my house he ate the healthy food and always told me it tasted way better than any other food anyways. He covered me with four coats of pro tan and did an excellent job (no streaks at all), cheered for me and took as many pictures as he possibly could when I was on stage. And he surprised me with a laptop the day after the show. My laptop died last year and I’ve been using a net book which drove me crazy for the past year. So, he got me the tools I needed so I could write and post my blog without wanting to bang my head against the wall.

As for me, I was last callout in my category, but whatever, I’m not too worried about it. I went out there and had fun with it. I’m happy with how I looked and know what I need to improve and that’s what I’ll be working on for the next 25 days as I get ready to compete with the WBFF on July 2 in Calgary.

Almost there

This is my last week of actual training before peak week. I can’t believe I will be on stage in 12 days! This prep has flown by and I’ve enjoyed every second of it. I feel good and I’m happy with how I look. My body is changing on a daily basis and I can’t wait to see the remaining changes it will undergo.
 
I think one of the biggest differences for me this year was my mindset. When I look in the mirror I appreciate what I’m looking at. Yes, I still have some weight to drop before I’m stage ready, but I’m really happy with how far my body has come and even though I’m not stage ready today, I’m really happy with how I look.  I worked hard over my off-season and now I can see the results of that hard work.
 
Another thing that has been huge has been how other people around me have reacted to me dieting. Over the past couple of months I have received some of the most moving compliments from the most unexpected places and they have pushed me to try even harder. I’ve had people say some of the kindest things to me and until now I’ve never really realized how much my daily actions and lifestyle I live can affect and influence others.
 
Another bonus of this competition season is that my sister is prepping for the same show as me, except she’s competing in fitness instead of figure. I’m really proud of how far she has come. For the past couple years she has said she’s wanted to compete, but never matched her actions to her words. This year she said she was competing and made a plan and committed to it. She learned the elements she needs for her routine, has been training consistently and following her diet since February.
 
She calls me every day to ask me something about competing, but that’s understandable because it’s her first time and as a first time competitor you have tons of questions. The biggest thing with her right now is she keeps questioning whether she’ll be ready in time. The thing is she’ll look great on stage and she’s put in the work. Yes, she might not be the leanest girl on stage, but it’s her first show and she’s never weight trained consistently until this year. Getting that look takes time.
 
In the past week she’s had two people make negative comments about her competing. Both people said something along the lines of I don’t think you’ll be ready in time and maybe you should change something with your diet or training. That’s the rudest and most disrespectful thing you could say to someone. She’s come along way and this journey is about her vs. herself and nobody has any right to discredit the work she has done. And if she isn’t as lean as the other girls does it matter? She’s committed to a huge goal and has almost reached it. That’s the thing to be proud of for her. Everyone starts somewhere and nobody has any right to take away from that.